You know what I don't get? I just do NOT get douches that feel it necessary to yell rude things out their open car windows as they drive by you. I mean really....what the hell is that about? Other than the fact that they're clearly douches with no self worth and it helps them feel somehow better about themselves and their own sorry ass lives to yell some rude slur at you. Whatever.
An illustration...if you will:
This morning Max had a little friend over to play. When it was about time for Grant to go home, I decided that we would walk him home. Because goodness knows my keister needs some form, ANY form of exercise at this point. It's a fairly short walk anyway, and it would be great for Max, as he loves to get out and run. I put on my shoes, gathered my water bottle and cell phone and off we went. Now...I may or may not have been wearing my rattiest pair of capri pj pants and a t-shirt, both of which were 3 sizes to big. I clearly hadn't showered and was looking my absolute "hottest" for sure. But hey, short walk, getting exercise, letting the kid play. The boys took off like a shot, and by shot I mean....rocket ships. I was half a block behind those two, but they were sooo happy. Before we knew it, we were at Grants house, and I'd already waved and said hello to three people I knew. After leaving Grants, I decided to walk up past our old house and around the block into our old ward neighbord (sadness filled my heart). As I was walking up the busier "main" street a gold truck went by and some totally mature, self respecting assmunch yelled out "SLOB" at me. Really? REALLY? I have never wanted to chase down a truck and punch a person in the face more. What the hell do YOU know you douche? In the immortal words of my dear Jer...."sorry about your dick dude." (he says that any time some guy peels out in their car, or drives a huge truck and tries to show off like a dork).
Dear loser in the truck:
I'm so sorry that you're life is so pathetic and miserable that you felt like yelling at a random stranger would make you feel better. I'm sorry that you feel superior to the random MOM walking down the street by calling her a rude name. I'm sad for you and your tragic life. Sad that you have NO idea who I am, WHAT I am or how FAR from a slob i am (though to be fair, my clothing choice may not have presented that in the best light). Here's hoping you can grow up and get a real life and realize that name calling, as you drive by in a truck is so freaking cowardly. Put your big boy pants on and act like a normal human. There is never any call for name calling, most especially to complete strangers who have done nothing to you. It proves nothing, it gets you nowhere and really, in the end, does NOT make you feel better.
Good thing I know I'm WAY hotter than his girlfriend or wife. HAHAHAHAHAHA I kid. But, I really did need to get that off my chest. And, it's not as if that's the first time I've had someone yell something at me. But seriously, keep your immature, rude thoughts to yourselves. I DO!
That being said, I'm outy. Gotta keep my kids and the play guest from beating eachother, and then think about getting lunch for them. Freaking kids, always wanting to be fed or something. WHAT is up with that?
Sweatpants and punches,
April 22nd: Saturday Sharefest
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