Thursday, February 12, 2009

A Resignation

Dear Super Moms of America Society,

I am writing with a heavy heart and deeply regret to inform you that I may no longer be a member of your elite society. For you see, I fear I cannot uphold the lofty ideals of such membership. I've been questioning my placement in your midst for some time, but this morning was the final straw. I'm embarrassed to admit that my daughter, my precious little girl was fed POPCORN for breakfast. I know, I know, I'm just as mortified as you are.(Though in my defense it was organic kettle corn from Sprouts and quite tastey) But there is more...whilst she was ailing this last week, I caved under her pressure and allowed her to have the evil binky once again. We had wiened her from it for the most part. But, her pathetic eyes, and tragic crys got to me and so, once again, the binky is ever present in her day. HOW can someone as weak as I continue to have membership in your elite group? I wish I could stop there, but in the interest of full admission, I must tell you that I also do NOT play sensory games with my children, unless you count me yelling "you're gonna feel the sensation of your bed if you keep fighting, or keep crying, etc." You get the jist. Somehow, I DON'T think that counts. I also fail to have tea parties with them, roll around on the floor, play tag or take them to museums. And my reading time is NOT 15 minutes a day as is suggested on PBS. I dare say that there have been a couple of days where I have actually NOT combed their hair (gasp in horror) or got them dressed. Oh what to do, what to do? The turmoil inside me is too much. The implications are too obvious. It is for these reasons that I HAVE to resign from your prestigious group. I shall ever endeavor to regain my standing.

With warm and humble regards,


Popcorn evidence. The problem was...I had to do her hair, and to keep her occupied, she usually has fruit snacks, but today it was the infernal popcorn. Objects just don't work so much. Anyway, this morning we were ready before breakfast, and frankly, she wanted NOTHING but the popcorn. So, Jere loaded her tray up, this pic only shows the end of a very satisfying popcorn munch by her royal highness.

More evidence of my ineptitude. And it's a hideous binky at that. But I ask you, can you look at those sicky eyes and NOT want her to have her comforter?

Here she is in all her sicky glory. It's been a ROUGH week around here. Max started with a bad cough last Monday, and then by Thursday Maggie had picked it up. It seemed harmless, as in, just a cough with clear snot. But, by Saturday night when we picked them up from my parents, Maggie had a 103 fever and Max was at about 99. This joy and rapture lasted for several days. Fevers, snot like you would NOT believe and a deep, rumbly cough. You know it was bad because Maggie was insisting on 2 naps a day and just holding me the rest of the time.

Add in Brooklyn and her 103 fever and cough and her dramatics and Monday was about the crappiest day ever! THEN, try having Brooklyn want to be held, because hey, all sick kids do want that, but Maggie would have NONE of that. If Brooklyn came near me, Maggie would go into crying fits, and scream at Brooklyn, or push her away. So, SO fun!

By Tuesday afternoon Maggie was a bit perkier, though the snot and cough continue. Auntie Julie watches the kids on Tuesdays and she took Maggie for a ride to the store. THIS is what she came home with. She loved it so much she even spontaneously smiled for the camera. WOW! You'll be glad to know that Brooklyn wore that same headband today to the store. She proudly bee bopped around Fry's with her headband of glory. Quite cute actually.

This is Auntie Julie, we love her and appreciate all she does for us!
You'll be glad to know that by Wednesday Brooklyn was ok enough that she actually got dressed and we ventured out to Sprouts. Are you EVEN aware that they have red and green peppers TWO for a DOLLAR! Uh, that's freaking AWESOME!~!! I LOOOOOOOOOVE me some red peppers, and I cook with them whenever possible.
Anyway, that's out update from Casa Van. Hope all is well with the rest of you peeps!
Red peppers and tummy love,


Jason and Kate said...

You are too funny! I told myself from day one that I would never join that club so you are free to join my club of never getting anything done. :)

LanaBanana said...

HA! You're resigning? You're not cool until you're kicked out, like me. Yeah, you have to be a total crap mom to get kicked out. :) I wear the button with pride.

Angie said...

Never fear you go to a much better place. I admit I feared all that do gooding was going to be your demise. Although, I must admit orthodonics suck and chances are if she keeps that binkie much longer you will have a life time of ortho a head of you. From one binkie user to another run it over. Throw it out. Date your daughter out to Orville Reddenbacher if it softens the blow. Just remove that oral fixaction as soon as possible. Braces are running about $5,000 right now. Now forgive me while I give my children cold cereal with yesterdays expired milk.

jen said...

That must explain Tucker's tongue fixation. He did have his pacy until he was almost 3. Chose one out of a box like an expensive cigar.
Just FYI, there really is no one in that club.
At least not anyone you'd want to hand out with.

Sarah S. Foote said...

Good for you-that club is lame! And whatever the guilt... There's always someone doing WAY worse.

Greg and Tammy said...

Welcome to the "plain ol' regular - but really super awesome mommy club" where there are no expectations or American Pediatric Society or PBS. Just love your kids. That's the rule. And you ROCK at that rule. Sorry about the sicknesses. That really stinks.

Andrea said...

If it makes you feel better yesterday Taralee had a granola bar and a fruit roll up for lunch. She only had that because she feel asleep on the way home from Taco Bell and didn't get to enjoy her oh so very healthy lunch from there. And then I had to wake her up to make it to my kids dentist apt. So her lunch was actually at 2:30 in the dentist office lobby not at 12:00 at our dinner table. Also I have some kids that had binkies (we call them plugs because they plug them up really well), kids that sucked thumbs, and kids that needed nothing. So far I am 3 for 3 with braces. If her teeth are what you are worried about with the plug, I don't think they cause as much damage as people think. If it is in their make up it is gonna happen regardless when you pull the plug away. I personally hate it when kids try to talk to me with the plug hanging out the side of their mouth. That is my reasoning for pulling the plug. Have a lovely day!

Mel said...

You are still the rockstar mom in my world :)
I hope everyone gets to feeling better soon.

Jere is Cool said...

I can't believe the shame you have brought upon our good family name by resigning from the mom club! Shame shame shame.

In other news, ditch the binky and let her scream. If you'd like to wait until I'm around to do that then so be it. I'm all for the screaming. I'm very anti-binky as you know due to my neice's fascination with hers - and what is she 9 or something now? Sheesh!

You're a GREAT mom! I wish I were a fraction of the good parent you are! Seriously! You beat yourself up too much. I love you and think you're perfect. Ride that wave and forget the rest!

Crandell Fam said...

Hey, sadly, I couldn't resign or be kicked out because I was NEVER INVITED TO JOIN!!! I hate those stupid perfect moms out there. Who needs 'em?? I just wish I could be a LITTLE more like them sometimes (but don't tell anyone!) I think you're the greatest, so feed 'em popcorn and give 'em binkies, who cares? You're the best!