Wednesday, November 12, 2008

Confessions of a baby trucker...

I have a confession to make.....





Today...I...wenttoWal-mart. Phew, there it is, out in the open. But I promise, there was a good, sound reasoning behind my sacrelige. And besides, when you look like this (pretend there is an arrow pointing down at the picture) then you know you TOTALLY fit in at the devils store. First, about this hat, and look Mags is sporting. Her Auntie Julie came over to watch her and was wearing this hat. Maggie was totally taken with said hat and insisted on wearing it around. It was quite funny, and you have to admit, she looks cute, if not a touch on the white trashy side.







Nothin says "Hot" like a hockey hat perched high on the head, and your "mug" in one hand.



Ok, so how did this blasphemy come about...ME in Wal-mart when I JUST posted about how I hate that store and won't go. Well, it's like this. We never made it to the store yesterday due to Maggie having melt downs and me having a little "tummy trauma" if ya know what I mean. So, today, after a lovely morning of playing outside, Maggie napping, etc. I got up the courage to load all 3 kiddies in the car. Do you have any idea how freaking annoying it is to squeeze my big bootay into the far back of the van so I can buckle Brooklyn in. I have to do this and try not to kill Maggie with my said large booty backing out of the van so I can then buckle Maggie in. Well, trust me on this, it is VERY annoying and awkward. So, I got them all situated and was heading toward Target when I began to think about what I needed to do. I also needed some grocery items and would need to go the store for that too. As I pondered the situation and the possibilities and the fact that I'd have to do the booty squeeze a total of 4 times (in and out) by going to 2 stores, I quickly deducted that I'd rather eat razor blades, so what were my other options. Sadly, the only store that fit the bill of me only needing to get out once was Wal-mart. I took a deep breath, changed my course and off we went. All in all, it wasn't a bad experience. I got what I needed, possibly saved a dollar or two and was on my way. So, there you have it, I defected, but only this once. I'm sure you can see how it was necessary to do so. And Dixie, you can stop rolling your eyes. I can't help it if you are freakishly attached to that store.


Speaking of Dixie...it has been brought to my attention that I did not give proper shout outs and kudos to her for the oh so clever sign off of "armchairs and honeybees." Little does she know that I TOTALLY gave her credit for it when my sister Jenny laughed out loud at it and thought it was so funny. The thing is, many a year ago when Dixie was off at Ricks and I was slaving away here in AZ, we would write eachother letters. Well, for whatever reason, she signed off one of her letters that way and it began a very hysterical exchange between us on every letter. I have always remembered and used many more times the "armchairs and honeybees" signoff. So there you go, hope you feel properly shouted out to Dixie.

In an effort to properly document 3 of 3 t-shirts, I TRIED to take a picture. However, Maggie was having NONE of it. I tried everything, and this was seriously ALL she would give me. I begged, I pleaded, I cajoled....NOTHIN. I ask you, HOW am I to properly exploit my child in modeling, beauty pageants, TV and movies, so she can make me millions of dollars if she REFUSES to cooperate? I now know that the reason such ugly babies like Mary Kate and Ashley Olson made millions in TV was because ugly or not, they were totally willing to do WHATEVER grownups told them. For reals..think back to the hideous show that was Full House, remember that UGLY baby? Yeah, those twinners made their parents LOTS of money. Oh Maggie, why can't you just behave? Clearly she doesn't recognize the goldmine she's sitting on. Tee hee hee

Well, this is getting way to long, and I have other things I want to cover, but I guess I'll have to save it for another time. Oh except this....

KUDOS to Lana for totally getting the Strong Bad quote in my last post. You now have my love and admiration forever and ever and ever. Not that you didn't already have it, but it's just increased.

And finally...can anyone out there PLEASE help me to figure out how to put video on here. I have some cute footage and know NOT how to upload it here. So, anyone? Lessons, love me, come HELP me!

Turkeys and tots

Allyson

11 comments:

Dana said...

Walmart is off limits? Yikes, don't think I've purchased groceries anywhere other than there Sam's Club or Costco in years! Hmmmmm Thanks for the heads-up.

Molly Shumway Rawlins said...

I can never get the blogger video uploader to work, so I created a youtube account, and just upload the video there, and use the embed code provided and paste it into my post.

ZippityDoDaw said...

To upload video there is an icon next to the insert picture option when you are making a new blog, select that, then find the file you want to share, and upload it. That is it. My husband dictated these very precise instructions. I did upload a video once. (By I, ofcourse I mean HE) Best wishes!!

THaNk you for your lovely visit to my sit and comments! You and your comments are also very welcome company! :)

jen said...

I also reserve Wal-Mart trips for truly desperate times when I cannot bear multiple stops. These desperate moments are becoming increasingly more common. Watch for the subtle pull on "groceries and socks" on your Target-committed psyche! The economy cannot tolerate such indecision these days! Why do they reserve SuperTarget for the southeast valley? We would love it here!

Dixiechick said...

Yep. I feel sufficiently shouted out to. Much thanks. :)

LadyCarma said...

Here in Plano, Tx. they do things a little different. We don't have a Target at major intersections. But we do have Walmarts-super and regular. Within three miles of my house are three different Walmart stores. I love them. There are only two Target stores in Plano, and both are more than six miles from my house. To me, the store to shop is the one close to you. I don't have specific loyalties, just convience.

A Walmart story: One day when I was so sick last Jan-March, I asked Steve to stop at Walmart on the way home from Sherman and pick up a few food items. When he got home, I was putting the items away and there was a wrist watch in the plastic bag. I asked him if he had bought me a present? No, he didn't buy it. Sure enough, it wasn't on the receipt. So the next week when I felt better, I took the receipt and the watch to Walmart. The customer service guy couldn't believe that I would bring back an item that I hadn't paid for. He still smiles and waves at me every time he sees me in the store. I guess they don't see honesty that much!

Mel said...

Maggie can make anything look cute :) Oh walmart...you really are the devil!

Andersonland said...

Ok, so we all have to dance with the devil from time to time, and I can totally understand why you would not want to get kids in and out o' the van mulitple times....although I will always say that Target is the best .... I love you TARGET!

Thanks for worrying about me too, and who would give me a shower. Maybe the next time I come home we can have giftless baby shower, or just a get togehter at my Moms for all my friends to come and see me and the baby....I did miss not having my peeps with me, however I do sing showtunes regularaly and imagnine that I am dancing on the front porch at your house...it makes me feel happy. :)

Livin' Wright said...

I Used to HATE WalMart, then I realized that I am Poor and their stuff realy is stinkin' cheap. Don't worry, when we go there we dress the part... Nix in a diaper and me with no shoes :) we have to fit in! Maggs is adorable, can we hang out when we come up for Thanksgiving, even if its just a stop by? I am dying to see Max! I will give you a call.

Sabrina Bodine said...

I hear you about WalMart. I went there the other day and 2 out of the three bags of socks I bought were missing one sock. So I had 9 and a half pair of socks in each bag. I was really mad because I had to go back and believe it or not, the closest WalMart is 15 minutes away and let's just say Lily HATES the car. Lucky me:)

Tara LaRue said...

I LOVE your posts - you are hilarious and I can hear your voice in my head as I read what you write. Love you friend.