Monday, December 8, 2008


So, the saga continues...this morning when I went to get Maggie, I was assaulted by the henious smell of barf filling the air. Apparently she'd puked in the night and then rolled around in it for good measure. It was all stuck in her hair, and all over her bed. I took pictures, but the camera is still in her room, and she's not asleep yet, just chatting in her bed. But seriously people, what is THIS about? Let me backtrack for a moment to yesterday.

The time was 7:30 a.m., I was up, already fully showered and halfway done with my make-up. Maggie was puttering around, as she does while I get ready. The phone rang, it was my Mom asking if we were blessing Max today. I told her no, and she asked if it was because too many people were sick. Apparently she'd had the poopy doos all weekend, and my Dad has some bronchial trauma, and Dixie, well, she just REALLY knows how to do sick up right. So, i assured her it wasn't because of that, but just as she was talking of her toilet needs, Maggie sidled up to me and UNLOADS what can only be described as the gushing of a thousand rivers. I said, "Umm, or perhaps Maggie is going to have it now. Got to go." Sure enough, it was her first official diapoo, straight liquid people. So, at that point I gave up the dream, didn't bother doing my hair and just stayed in my pj's all day. Well, Jere had a migraine, and wouldn't you know, I wasn't feeling so hot myself after awhile. To make this story just a pinch shorter, by that evening I was aching all over, FREEZING cold and suffering some intestinal traumas. If you know me at all, you know that I do NOT ever get sick. Seriously, sick and I don't know eachother. I mean, I havce allergies, I get colds, but not like achey, barfy sick. So, I was feeling a wee bit nauseus too, but I knew nothing would come of it. At 8:00 I trudged over to Dixies for our triatholon meeting (see her post) and I was NOT feeling good. I sat trhough the meeting, used the toity once, and then suddenly, I had to leave, and NOW. I was totally crying, unvoluntarily, it just happened, because I was so nauseated and crampy. So, I came home, and just curled in a ball on the bed. If I didn't move at all I was sort of ok, but if I thought of moving, it sucked. So then the big bathroom moment came. I'm sitting there and suddenly, the hot from head to toe, the cold that follows, this awful feeling of, barf is comiing. I proceeded to wretch so loud I'm surprised Dixie didn't hear it. I threw up, and just heaved and heaved. It sucked. But, after that I felt much better, other than I was still freezing cold and my tummy hurt. So, I went to bed and sometime halfway through the night I finally got hot, took off my layers and felt much better by morning. I'm still suffering some tummy trauma and I feel ughish, but all in all, it could be worse. I just don't do sick, I feel sorry for people who throw up a lot. I can literally list on practically one hand the times I have thrown up. And now, I'll do just that, in desending order from most recent down.

April 7, 2002: It was our honeymoon, we were on a cruise ship, motion sickness is a B*@%!. I especially deserved it, 'cause I had made fun of Jere for having motion sickness.

Jan. 2001: I had the full on flu. I was home alone, school wasn't back in session yet and I was sooooooooo sick. I finally dragged myself to the ASU clinic and they just looked at me like I was stupid, 'cause I'd waitied to long, there was nothing I could do. I threw up with this flu.

Christmas Day 1995: I was on my mission and it came out of NOWHERE! Barfing, toilet, horribleness! My phone call home wasn't all that great, 'cause I was so weak and felt like such crap.

April 1990: I threw up in DISNEYLAND! I was on choir tour and again, came out of nowhere. I went to the bathroom, got sick, and then the barfing began. I totally bawled, 'cause don't you all cry after throwin up? It just sucks. I felt awful, and I remember, we went over to the Splash Mountain ride, and while my friends went on it, I sat down/laid down next to the fence across from it. Some stupid employee came by and told me I wasn't allowed to sit/lay there. He didn't care that I was possibly dying. haha

May 1990: A wicked case of strep throat. It was misery at it's finest. I missed like a week of school and had to DRAG myself to the awards ceremony, 'cause I was getting some big honor., I missed bacalarueate (how do you spell that?) and just made it to graduation. No barfing here.

That's it folks, I think there is one other time somewhere in Jr. High that I threw up. I can't speak for myself as a child, but all in all, a pretty stellar record. Aren't you glad you know?

Just want to send a shout out to my sister Dana. It's her birthday today, and I'm saying a big HAPPY BIRTHDAY! She's the best sister, I don't know what I'd do without her. She's one of my best friends in the whole world, and I just want her to know how much I appreciate her for all her advice, listening, wisdom, love, random clothes gifts, laughs, etc. Thank you for all you do! Hope this day is all you want it to be!! I LOVE YOU!!


Dixiechick said...

I am in shock and awe that you remember all the times you've thrown up. And, BTW, I don't usually cry after I throw up. If someone's around I usually make a joke. Ask Shane, I did it this past time. Makes me feel a little better. I usually want to cry or do cry BEFORE, but after ...ship-shape. :) What IS this crazy sickeness making its rounds? I'm glad I'm done with my spell.

LanaBanana said...

Wow. Not going to Nina Drive or 6th Ave. for awhile, thanks so much. You creepy sickies can stay away from me. I am sad for your wretched sickness. It's a bummer when everyone in the house feels sick and mom and dad both feel too terrible to care for their children. Misery. Glad to hear you're on the mend soon.

jen said...

All the tales of sickness be d**#@!. You had a triathlon meeting? What?? Just kidding. Hope all is better there. The flu officially sucks. I don't think Tuck is making it to voice tomorrow. I'll try to call you. Emergency family thing.
PS So NOT kidding about the triathlon! Call me next time!

ZippityDoDaw said...

I am really hoping you did not share what you have last night! Ughhhhh, I hate the stomach flu! Rest up and get well...

Andrea said...

You are too funny. Documenting sickness only Allyson! I am the same way I can count on one hand the times I have thrown up. But I won't share them with you only because I can't remember the exact date and time. Hope you feel better. Hope your hubby feels better migraines are for the birds! I hate them. Hope your family feels better soon.

Dana said...

I can count all 300+ times I threw up just being pregnant...... :) Thanks for the sweet words. The feeling is mutual and you freaking made me cry for the 100th time today--happy tears. Apparently 42 is a really emotional birthday.