Friday, March 18, 2011

Know the "NO"!

This one:

She's gonna be the end of me, I just know it.

The other morning we were standing in the kitchen, me working on breakfast or some such and Maggie working on getting her hand JUST right with something.  I glanced down at her, just as she looked up at me and proudly showed me her hand.  And when I say proud, I mean, she had a naughty gleam in her eye and she proudly said, "Look what I'm doing."

It looked a little something like this:


Thank you Google Images for any picture you EVER wanted.

As I stared down "the bird" and looked at my daughters haughty little face, I assessed the situation and pondered my plan of attack.  In probably one of my calmest moments ever, I asked her why she might be doing that.

Maggie:  Because
Me:  because why?
Maggie:  I WANT to.
Me:  WHY do you want to?  Do you know what it means?
Maggie:  YES I do!
Me:  What does it mean when you put you finger like that?
Maggie:  It means........................................NO! (as she thrust extended middle finger at me)(and also, I wish you could see her thinking face, cause it's really cute)
Me:  Oh really? (and all this time I thought it meant something FAR more sinister)  Hmmmm.  Where did you learn that?
Maggie:  (a moment of thought)  Miss Ranelle (who for the record is the SWEETEST most amazing preschool teacher EVER and probably has never even THOUGHT of flipping someone off).
Me:  Ummm no, I'm pretty positive you did NOT learn that from Miss Ranelle.
Maggie:  Mmm hmmmm, yes I did!  Miss Ranelle taught me!
Me:  No she didn't.
Maggie:  Yes, ah ha, it means NO! (as she thrust it in my face YET again)

And then I took the opportunity to teach Maggie the Birds and the be.....ok just kidding.  But I did explain to her that it did indeed NOT mean no, but something much worse.  I said that it was actually very rude, and offensive and that it meant something disgusting.  And that perhaps she should NEVER flash that finger in that way again (until a proper age and a proper situation presents itself of course) most especially at her Mother because she doesn't want to do something.  I just wont abide by one finger salutes.

She gave it  a little thought, shrugged her shoulders, after asking what offensive meant and then went on her merry way.  So far, no bird sightings have been had.

Just thought you'd like to


NO!
(Oh my sides.  I slay me)

Flips and slips,

Allyson


8 comments:

alison said...

oh thank you for doing two very fabulous things: using homophones in your blog post and including a little austin powers up in here ;) i laughed until my sides hurt! i, too, always believed that "the finger" meant something more notorious than "no". hmmmm....so i guess i can't start flashing the bird at my students on a regular basis??? i'll just tell them that maggie said it was okay!

Aimee said...

LOL I love it. Kids are so funny because usually when they say a bad word or do something bad like that they have no idea what they are really saying. They just saw someone do it and they want to do the same thing.

Great job on handling that...I like that you asked her why she was doing that.

Kristina P. said...

That sounds like a proud mothering moment!

Kellie said...

Hahahahahaha, funny!! You had me going for a second with the birds and the bees thing.

Rita/Fighting Off Frumpy said...

Ahahahahahaha!!!! That is one thing we have yet to experience here (and, for the record, I'm thankful!).

It makes sense though. Thumbs-up for yes, the bird for no. Totally reasonable in Maggie's mind, I'm sure! :)

LanaBanana said...

oh you know Miss Ranelle spends a good 30 minutes each day on the pledge, "You're a Grand Ol' Flag" and Middle Finger salutations. Please. Any good preschool teacher does that.

I remember the middle finger phase for our kids was around this same age. They seem to have forgotten the excitement of it recently. Hope it stays that way for awhile.

:)

cooper crandell said...

My oh My! Glad she was able to tell you so clearly what it meant and who taught it to her! Wouldn't Miss Ranell be surprised to know all her students are learning! :) Well handled by you, however. Kudos!

Cookie Mama said...

Bahaha no means no. Thanks for the good laughs Maggie. All I want to know is if she's been able to find a use for it at church yet. Gotta love kids!