Friday, May 14, 2010

Whale Tail is NOT ok

So, there we were, late Friday night watching a little Ellen when this travesty of fashion befell my eyes.
Girls were playing this blindfolded, musical balls game.  What?  It sounds wierder than it really is.  If you don't watch Ellen, YOU SHOULD!  So freaking funny!  But, I digress.  Anyway, there the "ladies" were searching for balls, and this one particular lady, bent over, reaching, reaching, searching for a ball.   What to my wondering and perfectly innocent eyes should appear but nasty Thong  or "whale tail" if you will.  This woman, totally flashing her bright red, lacey thong panties to the world.  Really?  REALLY?  Why is this ever ok?  You know this woman, upon watching the show at home is dying a million deaths at her fashion faux pas.

To make my point ever clearer, I took it upon myself to find a picture or three on the internet.  Are you ready? 

Seriously?  What in THEEE HELL is going on here.  Who said this is ok?  Do you not feel that you skanky little who-ers?  And, did they plan this that morning as they got ready.."hey Chloe, let's totally wear our thongs today and make sure they hang out from our jeans at least 4 inches."  "Yeah Tiffany, that will be soooo hawt."  This Can NOT be comfortable.

You MUST be kidding me with this right? Who sits down at the club, and chats it up and DOESN'T realize their freaking ASS is hanging out.  Who I ask you?  Oh yeah, hussies, that's who.

This just in from the files of : OH NO YOU Di'INT!  Oh yes she did.  I cry a tear on this one.  A tear for having to have my eyes raped by seeing this.

So yes, I am totally passing judgement, I'm ok with this.  Get over it.

I ask you, my fearless readers.....WHY thongs?  Who EVER thought that a piece of string up your kiester and your hoo haw would EVER be comfortable.  I'm perplexed.

Do you find this trend offensive, nothing to get your "knickers in a twist about" or what?

I shall now leave you with this gem:

I'm reminded of a little thing Rosie did years ago on her show.  She had "thong" week, and my favorite quote EVER came from Minnie Driver.  When asked if she wore thongs, she responded.  "No, they make me feel as if me bum is eating my underwear."

I couldn't have said it better myself sister.  I could NOT have said it better myself.

Munching bums and eyesores,



I'm a full-time mummy said...

LOL! Love the quotes from Minnie Driver! Totally agree with you - I mean, what went on in their mind wearing things like that?

Dropping by from Malaysia to wish you a Happy SITS Saturday!

Rocketgirl said...

That is sooooo 1996! I think I remember reading that Monica Lewinsky was walking around the White House with her thong all a-showin' and that's what got Bill all hott and bothered. No way on earth would I wear a thong. Heck, I can't even find any decent lingere because it's all g-strings or boy shorts. Both of which are just disgusting on any normal woman who has given birth. Barftastic. I dare you to find anyone who approves of whale tale!

LanaBanana said...

I learned something new...I never had heard it called "Whale Tail", but it made me guffaw rather loudly. Well written post. Sooo funny.

The Atomic Mom said...

We just call that skank butt at our house. But since we're Maraman with our top secret skivvies it's not a prob.. :)

jen said...

SOOOO not okay.
Soo not okay.

sammy said...

so coming from a guy's perspective, when i first i see this 'whale tail' im all like 'damn you can see that girls underwear'

but then it soon becomes 'damn you can see that girls underwear....why??'

i dont get it though. its like kinda hot and trashy all at the same time.

but ive NEVER understood the appeal to thongs. they look good on my wife while in the bedroom, but to wear one all day seems like it would feel like an eternal wedgie

Natalie said...

Okay, whale tail is NEVER okay, ever. And it always seems to be people that shouldn't be wearing thongs that are wearing them.

Now, that being said...I do wear thongs. You get used to them, really. But I never show the whale tail, ever. I'll even wear a tank top under a shirt just so my undies don't accidently show. TMI? I hope not!

Steph said...

All I can say is, AMEN SISTER! My husband (not to mention my soon to be 12 year old son) does not need to see some chick's underwear! And neither do I! I think there is just no way they don't know it's showing--there's gotta be a breeze goin' on there.

sarah said...

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DianD said...

Yep, truly sick and classless people! No respect for themselves or others, and that's a sad commentary on our society! Learned a new term, though. Whale tail is tragic.... So is plumbers crack. Sick, sick, sick and so NOT sexy, nowhere, nohow!

✩Molly✩ said...

I totally saw that on Ellen. :) pretty much thought the same thing as you except i thought, Man I sure hope they give her a big prize for participating!

thanks for the chat the other night. I posted a new blog... and i'm gonna look for that business card for ya.

erin said...

dude i love ellen! she is heeelarious!
but those thong shots are disgust. eck.

Melissa said...

I saw that episode and pointed the thong out too. Haha.

LadyCarma said...

As a substitute teacher in middle and high schools for the past thirteen years, I got so tired of seeing boobs, bellies and butts! One male senior in high school was wearing white briefs, with his "hang off the hips" pants! I told him to pull UP his pants! And he didn't even pull a gun on me, just the pants UP! Digusting! There were two girls on the plane from Denver to LV this morning, hanging out all parts - BB&B (and I don't mean Bed, Bath, and Beyond here people), and it made us all shudder! And when the girls dress like that, and then accuse male teachers of looking down their blouses/shirts! I don't get it.

Wendy said...

In a word: Hilarious.

Anonymous said...

Took me time to read the whole article, the article is great but the comments bring more brainstorm ideas, thanks.

- Johnson

Unknown said...

Personally, as a male I love when I get a peak at a girls thong. My only regret is that manufacturers create this amazingly hot garment for obese out of shape women. Only fit in-shape women should ever wear thongs/g-strings/t-bars. Women invented thongs because they didn't want men to see their visible panty lines. I just like to say thank you from every red blooded male on planet earth!

BikerDude said...

Nothing is sexier on a lady than a visible thong "Whale tail". Please keep showing them!